quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
