Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
