he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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