Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
