We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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