My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Randomize
