Tell her she can't have a vagina
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize