god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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