I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
