the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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