I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
