somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
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