he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
