You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
