You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
