I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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