the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize