I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
