You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
