Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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