i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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