VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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