i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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