there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I need to calm my uterus...
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
