the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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