I saw his package. It spoke to me.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
