i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I have fence marks all over my body
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Oh god it's open bar.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
