just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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