We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
