he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
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