What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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