Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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