belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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