When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
