Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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