I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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