Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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