Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
