So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
this hospital has no fireball
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
