What a fucking waste of an outfit
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
