New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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