I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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