Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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