And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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