Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
