woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
