all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
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It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
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I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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