yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Randomize
