Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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