I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Randomize
