Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
